Strong Courage Take

Monday March 26, 2012

This morning I went to meet with the oncologist for the first time. Lincoln and Kathy came with me. We had a prayer prior to leaving that we’d understand all the information we’d be given and what the future treatments would be like. Kathy’s job was going to be to take notes of what the doctor was telling us and to remember our list of questions. Lincoln was to take it all in and be a strong moral support to me. My job was simply to internalize what was being said and to be brave. Haha I wanted to be strong for this.

We arrived at 9am. We spoke with the doctor for 45 min. and I really like her. She was straight forward with me about possible side effects and what expect from the chemo treatments. I also felt like she was not just treating the cancer, but she was treating me as a person too. I was told I’d need to stop substitute teaching for at least six months. Too many germs in an elementary school. haha She also told me that I can continue to help coach Lexy’s competitive soccer team on the days that I feel good, but I need to do it from the from the side lines and not actually scrimmage with the girls. I was disappointed, but agreed. I mentioned the upcoming wedding and she wanted to know the exact date. I told her June 23^rd and she marked it in my records. She is going to do her best to work with my treatment schedule so that I’m having a good day for the wedding. I told her that is one important date that I don't want to miss. I want to be in the temple to see Tyler & Andrea be sealed.

She said that I have stage 4 lung cancer. I have a round of chemo once every 3 weeks. After 6 weeks, they will do a CT Scan of my chest and evaluate how the meds are fighting the cancer. If it looks good, we move forward, if not, then she'll adjust my medications. The doctor anticipates that I’ll do 6 rounds of chemo which is 18 weeks or about 6 months. Wow! Now I know what time frame to wrap my head around.

After all the talking, the nurse came in to access my newly implanted ‘port’ in my chest. It was extremely swollen and bruised from the surgery just 3 days ago. As the nurse came to access my port, I was a nervous about painful the process might be. Lincoln moved so the nurse could get close to me. Kathy held my hand on the other side. They did have difficulty accessing because it was so swollen and the nurse kept pushing harder and hard without any success. She asked the doctor to help and the doctor said that they may have to lay me on the exam table so they could push hard enough to get it. I asked them to wait a moment so that I could brace myself again the back of the chair I was sitting in. I told them to try again. This time I closed my eyes and a children’s Primary song came into my mind. Then I said a little prayer and asked Heavenly Father to take me by the hand and to allow all the fasting and prayers on my behalf to give me the strength to endure this moment. I felt a sweet peace wash over me and I knew I was not alone. It was then that the nurse said, we’ve got it! They said they were amazed that I didn’t hit them or yell out. Kathy said that I'm the bravest person she knows. I was just glad it was over. I recognized in that moment that prayer is a tangible power that can be tapped into in time of need to sustain us in life’s challenges. I was so grateful for that tender mercy. 

Once the port was in, I walked to the sitting area where there were 7 or 8 Lazy Boy recliners in a big half circle. There were 4 other people sitting in chairs with IV trees hooked up to them waiting for their medicine to drip into their bodies. I got started and Lincoln and Kathy took turns sitting next to me. They told us it would take 5 hours for the medicine to be administered because it was my first time. Next time it should take 3 1/2 - 4 hours and after that maybe 3 –3 ½ . Lincoln bought back lunch for us. I saw many people come and go during my 5 hour stay there. All the nurses and staff were extremely nice to me. The entire medicine aspect was not bad, just long. It was a strange experience. It felt like being in a 'toxic bar.' Each person told the nurses what they were in for and the then nurses would be them their own personal 'toxic cocktail.' The others were all in for lung cancer as well.

It was about 5pm by the time we finished up there. The doctor told me that I will lose my hair and so I really wanted to go wig shopping while my sister was still in town. I want to enjoy or have fun with this journery as much as I can. So we took our camera to the wig shop and I tried on all kinds of wigs in all styles & colors. They put a big nylon on my head to flatten all my curls and so the wigs would fit. It seemed like a big PED for head. You know, like the PEDS you put on your feet when you are trying on new shoes. Lincoln told me that I’ll be beautiful when I’m bald. Hahah He’s such a good husband. I know he really loves me. We finally settled on a very pretty one that I think will be nice for the wedding. I was so glad Kathy was there too!

We finished up getting all the prescriptions and got home around 7pm. Kathy then packed up her suitcase and was off to the airport to fly back to Seattle. I’m so appreciative of a wonderful sister who was sensitive enough to hop on a plane and come share this weekend with me. I love her dearly.

Lisa & Kathy - Forever Sisters

My nifty 'power port.'

Not just my sister, but my friend.