Do you really have cancer?

Sunday March 25, 2012 - Fast Sunday 

This morning, I felt odd attending church knowing that the ward was fasting for me and that they might talk about me. I was there with Lincoln & Lexy and my sister Kathy & her son, Alex. Before the meeting started a little second grade boy in the ward that I know from the elementary school approached me and asked, “Do you really have cancer?” I answered yes, I really do. He asked again, “Are you SURE you have cancer?” I laughed and said, “Yes. That’s what the doctors are telling me.” I could tell he was having such a hard time processing the fact that he was told I have cancer, which is supposed to be a scary sad thing, and yet I still look the same. I was at church and I was smiling. He asked me a third time. I simply explained that I was doing my best so that I can get better and return back to teach at the school. He walked back to his family with a very confused look on his face. I still don’t think he believes me.

To sum it up, the meeting was one of the most spirit filled meetings that I’ve been too. So many people shared their testimonies of faith and hope and healing and wished me a speedy recovery. They shared their love and support and stories of miracles happening in their own lives during times of trial and challenge and encouraged me to have hope.  Alex, shared a very tender testimony of feeling love from our ward and from our family.

I feel like my entire life has prepared me for this new journey. I know that I can do hard things with the Lord at my side. My faith is strong and I know that as we unite our prayers and faith together that the Lord can make miracles happen in my life. I am praying for a miracle. I want to live. I want to continue to be a mother and to become a grandmother. I want to grow with Lincoln and to continue to serve in any capacity that the Lord needs me.

As soon as the meeting ended, a new lady in our ward who was sitting in front of me said, “It’s an honor to fast for you.” Wow. I was overwhelmed. For some time people came up and talked to me & hugged me. I was emotionally exhausted afterwards. It was strange, but in a way I felt like I was attending my own funeral. Some people cried so hard and hugged me so tight, I felt like they were mourning my passing, even though I’m still here and plan on being here for some time to come! Haha I feel so blessed to be surrounded by so many good people.